Thunderstorms
by missanna444
Summary: When Beth ends up comforting Jo during a thunderstorm, she discovers that the thunder and lightning isn't what is actually bothering her older sister. Takes place sometime between Laurie proposing to Jo and Beth's death.


Thunder clapped loudly, rain pounding at the windows. It was the biggest rain storm Concord had seen in quite a long time. The thunder seemed to be right over their house, making it sound like the sky was exploding into a million pieces. At least, that's how Jo would later describe it. The noise was so loud that even though everyone was in bed, there was little chance that any of them were actually asleep. In fact, Beth was wide awake. It wasn't that she was scared, but the sound of such loud thunder certainly made her uncomfortable enough to not want to be alone. In times like this, she tended to go to one of her sisters or her mother.

She quietly crept out of her bedroom and went to the room next to her's, Jo's room. She expected her older sister to be fast asleep, unfazed by the crashing thunder and sounds from the storm. When she entered the room, however, she discovered that she was wrong. As soon as she opened the door, she could hear soft crying. Concerned, she walked over to the bed. She found that the crying was coming from Jo, who was curled up under the blankets.

"Jo?" Beth whispered softly, removing the blanket from her sister's head. Jo wiped her eyes and looked up at her sister.

"Bethie? What are you doing in here?" She asked.

"I didn't really want to be alone during the storm so I came to see you… But I see I'm not the one who needs help. Tell me what's wrong, Jo. It's not often I see you cry." Beth replied quietly, crawling into bed next to Jo.

"Oh, it's nothing really. I'm fine, don't worry." she said, having regained her composure in the few seconds that her sister had been in the room.

"Are you sure?" Beth checked, knowing that Jo often tried to act stronger than she really was.

"Would I lie to you?"

"No, you wouldn't." Beth giggled, glad to see her sister seemed in a better mood now.

"See? I'm perfectly fine-" she was cut off by a roar of thunder that shook the house. Jo immediately ducked underneath the blankets to avoid the sound and the lightning that followed immediately after. Beth's eyebrows shot up in surprise.

"Jo… Are you afraid of the thunder?" she asked gently, pulling her sister closer to hug her. Jo nodded meekly.

"It's ridiculous, I know. And you'd better not tell anyone, especially not Laurie, then I'll never hear the end of it." she muttered.

"Oh, Jo… My Jo…" Beth smiled softly. Thunder crashed again and Beth gently hugged her sister to comfort her. "I never thought I'd see the day when I was the one comforting you, Jo. Usually it's the other way around…"

"There's a first for everything, I guess." Jo sighed.

"What's wrong? You sound disappointed in something."

"Disappointed? I guess that's one way to think of it. It's just… I'm your older sister, I'm supposed to protect you. I'm supposed to be fearless, yet here we are with you comforting me. It's not how its supposed to be." Jo replied softly.

"Who said that's how things are supposed to be? It's okay to be scared once in a while." Beth said quietly.

"I'm supposed to be strong and I'm not. I'm supposed to be strong for you so that you'll be okay. I thought that was how things could get better…"

"The thunder isn't the only thing bothering you, is it?" The younger of the two sisters guessed. Jo was the sort of person who would pretend she was okay for the sake of others and just let it build up inside of her. And all it would take for all her trouble to come spilling out would be something relatively small. For example, a thunderstorm. Her silence was enough for Beth to know the answer to her question.

"Tell me, Jo. Tell me what's wrong." Beth said, in a tone so gentle that it comforted her sister quite a lot. Jo drew a deep breath and held it for a moment, then let it out in a long sigh.

"Everything, Beth. Everything is wrong. It feels like everything I care about is slipping away or changing. I hate change. Everything should just stay as it is and how I always planned." she said slowly.

"I wish I could tell you that nothing will ever change. But… maybe change isn't so bad."

"It means I have no control over things, over the future… What if… what if you don't get well again? What if Laurie never speaks to me after the way I rejected him? What if I never get to be a famous writer and change the world?" Jo said, her voice tight with emotion.

"But what if some of these things lead to new things? Of course, it would be horrible if Laurie never spoke to you, but maybe that will allow you to find someone else. Someone who makes you happier. And you will be a famous writer. Maybe you'll only have one beautiful book, but it'll happen. And you have changed the world, whether you know it or not. And maybe not in the way you intended, but you have. You'll see." She paused for a moment to cough. Jo rubbed Beth's back gently while she coughed, silently wondering how her sister had gotten so wise. Once Beth had stopped coughing, Jo spoke up.

"What about if you don't get well again? What if you die, Beth? How can that possibly be a good change?" She asked, pointing out the one thing that Beth hadn't mentioned. Beth didn't say anything for a moment.

"I don't know, Jo…" she said slowly, shaking her head. "But promise me something…"

"Anything, Beth. What is it?"

"When I.. When I die, promise me you won't lose yourself in despair. Promise me you'll continue on with life after a little while and accomplish the things you were meant to. You can be sad and upset, of course, I know you will be… But don't let the sorrow take over your life. You feel things so strongly, Jo. And I know that it'll break your heart when I'm gone, but you mustn't let that get in the way of your life." Beth said slowly. Jo stared at her. She had never heard such words from her sister, nor did she want to hear them ever again.

What struck her the most was that Beth had said the word _when._ She said _when_ she died… Jo had always avoided using such definite words. Just minutes ago, she had said _if_ Beth didn't get better, as if there was still hope. As if things were still okay. But Beth had said _when_ she died, implying that she knew she wouldn't make it. And while Jo knew Beth was right, she hated to admit it.

"I… I promise…" she said, her voice breaking. There was a moment of silence, where neither of them knew what to say. Then something different happened. Jo, who never let anyone in the world see her cry, hugged her sister tightly and sobbed. All the emotion and fear that she had tried to hide from everyone for so long started spilling out. Beth soothed her as best she could, holding her close and repeatedly telling her everything would be okay.

Eventually, Jo fell asleep and Beth soon after. Surprisingly, Jo felt a little better the next morning. Although the night before had been filled with fear and sadness, she wasn't as afraid of the changes the future was bringing. She was a little bit cheerier the next morning, chatting happily with her family at breakfast, which was something she hadn't done since Beth had gotten sick again. By telling Beth everything that was bothering her, it seemed that a weight had been lifted off her shoulders. Yes, the things she had spoken of still bothered her and would for quite some time afterwards. But she didn't feel as though she had to hide her thoughts anymore.

 _A/N: I just wanna say something real quick. I have, on previous stories, been told that my characters are way off and I just want to say that if you review this, please don't tell me about how my characterization is wrong. This is simply how I interpret the characters. If you don't like it, then don't review._


End file.
